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| So, another year has flown by.
Along with it came new living arrangements, few new friends, closer friends, europe, and a lot more.
Twenty still sounds so young.
Oh gosh, I am so glad I just killed that mosquito. Falling asleep with little buzzings in my ear would have been horrible. | | |
| It's snowing again.
Sometimes I forget about people I know, and when I vaguely remember them, I question their existence. Occasionally I wonder if I'm just creating them in my head and they begin to seem unreal to me.
Yesterday I tied a light purple ribbon I found on a branch of one of the prettiest tree wood I've ever seen. The tree reminded me of the movie Pocahontas. I should have taken a picture of it. I wonder how many people noticed it.
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| Oh gosh...
My mother has been trying to have "God" talks with me.
I just feel like the more you learn about this world and about society and how things work, religion suddenly appears almost like the magical realism out of an Isabelle Allende novel. We're taught that there is a way in which everything works in this world. It all fits into a system of actions, objects, and people, however, religion doesn't seem to fit in logically.
The fight over religion has caused so many wars, so many battles, and so many deaths. Although we currently live in a society with "freedom of religion," I still sense discrimination of you wander far from the norm religion, Christianity. I'm befuddled that religion plays such a vital role in a political campaign. Would if have really made a difference if Barack Obama was a Muslim? Separation of Church desperately needs to be enforced. The fact that many politicians use "God's help" as a legitimate plan to resolve certain issues deeply troubles me.
There are too many questions unanswered for me in the church. To me religion is similar to when you're watching Star Wars and you question the way in which Luke Skywalker does something and the answer to every question is "with the force." Imagine the frustration you get when your parents say "because I say so." That is precisely how I feel.
It's not that I'm atheist or this or that. It's that I'm curious. A part of me feels there has to be a God because in a way I feel guilty for saying these things and sort of fear that a hell actually does exist. I have to wonder, though, if this is just my natural habit of thinking about it since I went to church my entire life.
Sometimes I see religion as the ultimate brain wash because some people speak about it like they have no individual thought, simply the quotation of others. My mother attempts to draw up a conversation about how sad she is that I am "drifting" from God. The conversations, more like speeches, are just as awkward and uncomfortable as having your sock half-way off while wearing a boot.
Sometimes I wish that I had a religion that I strongly connected with.
I don't mean to offend anyone because most of the time I admire those who have the trust and strength to be religious. At times I'm jealous that their puzzle pieces fit right in when mine are scattered with some missing . I guess the only reason why I'm writing this is because I don't have the heart to tell all of this to my mother. | | |
| Pienso mucho. Pienso de las cosas que yo puedo controlar y también en las cosas que no puedo.
La vida no es justa.
He estudiado mucho de la vida ficción y de la vida real este semestre.
La vida es rapida.
Que voy hacer con mi vida? Dónde voy a vivir?
A veces pienso que pudiera hacer más si yo era sola. Pero los otros veces pienso que tu me ayudas en muchos aspectos de mi vida.
La vida, la vida, la vida. | | |
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